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At the party, a few married male classmates, I jokingly asked: If I give you 5,000 yuan, would you go on a date with another girl? They all laughed heartily: "What do you think I am? My wife finds out, she'll skin me alive!" I said, what about 50k yuan? A few of them looked at each other, One said, "Just having a meal, that's okay," another said, "50k is a bit low, the risk is too high." I said, what about 500k yuan? There was a few seconds of silence. The most honest one spoke up:

My friend's company hired an intern who graduated from Tsinghua University, working in an algorithm position.
He asked the intern, "What AI do you usually use to write code?"
The intern said, "Kimi."
My friend was stunned: "Kimi? Isn't it Copilot or Cursor?"
The intern asked back, "What's wrong with Kimi? It works fine, just sometimes it writes a few nonexistent functions."
My friend fell silent.

Defeat magic with magic. You hurt him with 'bad luck,' and he heals you with 'stove.' This person is beyond saving.

I have a friend in Shanghai.
In early 2020, he sold a house worth 15 million yuan,
exchanged it for 2 million USD, and went to Japan to enjoy life for three years,
spending 300k USD.
In 2023, he returned to China, converted the remaining 1.7 million USD back to RMB,
receiving 12.5 million yuan.
Then he spent 10 million yuan to buy back the original house,
and still had 2.5 million yuan in cash.
He did nothing for three years, just eating, drinking, and having fun,
and ended up with an extra 2.5 million yuan in his pocket.

My uncle’s performance in that area has been poor lately, so he went to an old traditional Chinese medicine clinic.
After checking his pulse, the experienced Chinese doctor shook his head: “Deficient kidney yang has weakened, and the fire of the Mingmen is insufficient. You need to take deer antler, placenta powder, and a soup made with aconite, ten thousand and two.”
My uncle gritted his teeth and paid.
Later, I took him to a top-tier hospital.
After reviewing the medical examination report, the doctor said: “Your blood pressure is 160, your blood lipids are over the limit—your blood

My classmate, after graduation, went to work at a crematorium.
Not carrying bodies, but operating the boilers.
He worked there for a year, then went home for the New Year, and was not allowed into the house.
His mother said it was bad luck and told him to stay in a hotel.
He wasn't angry and said, "Mom, you’ll have to come to my place someday too. I’m being nicer to you now, so you won’t suffer later."
His mother’s face turned green.
He added, "Which furnace to burn, how long to burn, whether the ashes are crushed or not, I press the buttons."

I know a woman who has been married three times.
The first time, she married a wage worker, divorced after half a year, and received 20,000 yuan from him after the split.
The second time, she married a businessman, divorced after a year, and received a car from him after the split.
The third time, she married someone connected to demolition compensation, divorced after three years, and received a house from him after the split.
Now she’s in her early forties, with a house, a car, and savings, no children, and she works out and travels every day.
Her ex-husbands are still making payments on the

I know a delivery rider, in his fifties.
He said the hardest part isn't climbing stairs, but waiting.
Waiting for the restaurant to prepare the food, waiting for the customer to come downstairs, waiting for the elevator.
He said he calculated that the total waiting time in a day is enough to deliver twenty orders.
I asked, "So don't you rush them?"
He said, "Rushing doesn't help.
The restaurant says it'll be ready soon, the customer says it'll arrive soon, the elevator says it's already here.
Everyone's 'soon' isn't the same 'soon'."

I know a construction boss who is heavily in debt.
When the workers asked him for their wages, he said he had no money.
The workers said, then let's sell your car. He said the car wasn't his, it was financed.
The workers said, then sell your house. He said the house was rented.
The workers asked, then what do you have? He thought for a while and said, "I have one life. Do you want it?"
The workers fell silent. Later, he paid back the wages in installments.
On the day he finished paying, he treated the workers to a meal, drank too much, and cried, saying:

The leader held a two-hour meeting, with the first hour and a half spent talking about his glorious achievements in college.
Finally, someone couldn't help but ask: "So, what's the next step for our project?"
The leader was momentarily stunned: "I already explained it very clearly just now, did you not listen carefully?"
After the meeting, I asked my colleague what the leader had actually said, and my colleague replied: "He said he got second place in his college basketball tournament."

My friend sent me a Pinduoduo link: "Help me cut the price, just 0.01 left."
I downloaded the app, registered, authorized a bunch of permissions, and after cutting, he still was 0.01 short.
He told me to try again, so I tried once more, still 0.01 short.
He angrily said the software is a scam,
I told him how much he still needs, I can transfer it directly to him.
He said: "No, I’ve already spent three days on this,
I don’t want money, I want to win."

My colleague quit his job, saying he was going to start his own business.
Before he left, he treated us to a meal—full of confidence and high spirits:
“Brothers, once I’m rich, none of you will have to go to work anymore.”
Three months later, I checked his social media feed and saw he was selling insurance.
A month after that, he sent me a private message:
“Big bro, consider the insurance, will you? Just do me a favor—let it count toward my sales.”
And in my heart, I thought: this is real success—
So successful that everyone has to help him.

Scrolling through short videos, I just told a friend I want to buy a pair of running shoes, and the next second, the homepage is full of sports brand ads. I marvel at how well the algorithm knows me. My friend said, "Then try shouting 'I want a raise' at your phone now." I did as instructed. On the third day, my phone pushed a notification: "Nearby construction sites are hiring laborers, 300 yuan daily."

My mom is urging me to go on blind dates: “Look at Aunt Wang’s son next door. He just got married last month, and his wife is a doctor.” I said, “That’s pretty good.” My mom then said, “Your Uncle Li’s daughter got engaged last month, and her fiancé is a civil servant.” I said, “That’s not bad either.” My mom got anxious: “So what kind of person do you want to find?” I said, “Someone who doesn’t pressure me about getting married.” My mom was silent for three seconds: “Then you’ll have to wait another twenty-eight years,”

The boss said at the meeting: "Our company has no hierarchy, everyone is equal."
Then he turned to the admin and said: "Xiao Zhang, go buy me a cup of coffee, hot, seven-tenths sugar, no milk."
The admin just stood up, and the boss added: "By the way, equality is equality, but this month's reimbursement will be put on hold, we'll talk about it when finance is less busy."
Later I found out that recently, finance has been busy helping the boss's child with homework.

There’s a rumor in the martial world. It is said that there’s a kind of martial art—once you reach the ninth level, a dragon pattern appears on your back. That is the mark of the true Dragon Emperor. So many young people, for that dragon pattern, train obsessively. Later, a masseur stood up and said, “Don’t train—that isn’t a dragon pattern; it’s a kidney-deficiency pattern.” The martial world was in an uproar. All the major sects held meetings overnight. Shaolin said, “Our disciples sit in meditation for too long, and the patterns on their backs are the most—could it be that everyone is kidne

She is twenty-eight years old and has been working in this store for three years.
Every day, she has to touch the backs of more than ten people.
Some are fat, some are thin, some are young, and some are no longer young.
She has developed a skill: judging a person's anxiety type within three seconds.
"You're not sleeping well, right?" — Eight out of ten people will say, "How do you know?"
"Are you under a lot of stress?" — The remaining two will say, "That's true recently."

My first night with my new girlfriend. The atmosphere was great, the lights were dim, everything was perfect.
Three seconds later, she asked me, "Is it over?"
I said, "It's over."
She paused for a moment, "Are you... that kind of 'quick finish' type?"
I said, "No, I'm the 'already missing the past before it even starts' type."
She didn't laugh.
I added, "Do you know what the fastest man is like? He's already in memories before he even gets in."

A friend's story. He went to a seemingly upscale health and wellness club, and as soon as the technician started, they asserted: "Sir, your prostate might not be in good shape."
The friend was shocked: "Can you even feel that?"
The technician smiled slightly: "It's not felt, it's smelled."
The friend's face turned pale: "I... I have a smell on me?"