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Human suffering often stems from attempts to interfere with others' destinies.
Regret is an interference with the past self (which is also an object to the present self), and jealousy is an interference with others. Both are isomorphic, and both are about the illusion of control—"making reality conform to me."
Interference and control are expressions of perfectionism. Pursuing the "perfect self," seeking the "uniquely mine lover," chasing "pure emotions," and striving for "one-of-a-kind existence."
We often place too much importance on a certain element, and being too close to any object can impair judgment. Things that must be done, it’s okay not to do them; things that cannot be completed, trying is enough; things that cannot be lost, losing them still allows us to live.
Align the subject properly, and we no longer care whether the external world fully conforms to my wishes. Thus, "flaws" are merely objective existences, and "perfection" is originally the innate nature of all things.
Vagueness and uncertainty are our friends. Only within vagueness can there be focus—at a certain time, in a certain place, for a certain purpose, under a certain premise. Therefore, fate follows my heart, but not from my control; it arises from my non-control. By removing many irrelevant details, I become the true master of myself.
Wu Wei (non-action) and non-doing, the highest good is like water.