At three in the morning, I sat on the edge of the rooftop, my legs hanging outside.

The wind was strong, blowing so hard I couldn't keep my eyes open. I clenched my phone in my hand, the screen still lit up with a notification about a margin call. 320,000 yuan, 20x leverage, Bitcoin's price plummeting in that very moment—everything was gone.

That was the down payment my family used to buy me a house.

I stared down at the building below, the 23rd floor—should be quick. I even calculated it: gravity acceleration, about three seconds. After three seconds, all debts, regrets, and shame would disappear.

Just as I was about to let go, someone suddenly spoke behind me.

“Hey, buddy, do you have a lighter?”

I turned around. An older man in security uniform was squatting about three meters away, holding a cigarette. He didn’t come closer, just squatting there, his hand trembling a little.

I froze: “…No.”

“Oh,” he put away his cigarette. “Then what are you sitting here for? Stargazing?”

I didn’t reply.

He was silent for a moment, then suddenly said, “I also owed money once. In the late 90s, I lost twenty thousand in business. Back then, twenty thousand could buy a house in Beijing. I thought about dying too.”

I didn’t respond, but he continued, “I didn’t go through with it. Now I earn three thousand a month, paid off that debt after twenty years, finally finished paying it off two years ago.”

He stood up, put the cigarette back in his pocket.

“Kid, if you lose your money, you can earn it back. But if you’re gone, your thirty thousand just becomes a number—banks don’t burn paper for you.”

My grip on the railing loosened a little.

He turned to leave, without looking back: “Alright, stop catching the wind. Come down. I’ll treat you to some porridge I just cooked in the cafeteria.”

I sat for a long time. Then I came down.

The porridge was plain white rice porridge; he sprinkled some preserved vegetables into it. I took a sip, so hot that tears welled up in my eyes.

Living doesn’t seem that hard after all. #2月非农意外负增长